Breathe a little, Live a little, Yearn a little, Burn a little

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How long ago was it?

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The daughter of a friend turned eighteen recently. Well, quite a few kids had their birthdays, and graduations and announced where they were going to college so it has been pretty cool for the last couple of months. A couple even graduated college which is pretty mind blowing. But this eighteenth birthday one is special.


I have been reading post after post, watching picture after picture where she is smiling with incredible joie de vivre, impish, sparkling, open and friendly. Her pretty hair waving in the breeze, a close friend smiling or hugging beside, and the messages are all very similar. They talk about her liveliness, warmth, energy and drive. How she helped them or was a good friend over the last few years.


My friend passed away just a couple years ago, I instinctively thought, how could her daughter have grown up so much? Wasn’t it just a few years ago that I remember her sitting down with me and talking about her hopes for this girl? Just the other day, I remember being horrified at an immigrant parent’s worst nightmare, what would happen to my kids if something happened to me? And if life can be this uncertain, then why am I wasting time not living exactly as I hoped to?
Watching this girl reassured me in a way nothing else did. Reading these messages today about how she has touched so many lives with her warm spirit make me appreciate her strength, her inner steel. The families who clustered around and helped raise her are constant evidence of real good in this world. The father who rallied and became more is one of my heroes.


How long has it been? I need to check. Because I need to have that talk with my friend and tell her how beautiful her daughter is now. How proud she should be of the fact that she has grown to be such a wonderful person. How much I admire her and hope that my own kids are even a little bit like her. And how my prayers and wishes are with her on this special day.


Happy Birthday, not so little one. May life give you everything you deserve.
©alka